No Opener? No Problem.
No corkscrew? No bottle opener? Ain’t no thang! Here’s a creative guide to opening wine and beer so you can keep the party going.
We’ve all found ourselves in a situation where the options are limited to open a bottle of wine or beer. Sometimes there’s an easy solution, but more often than not, you have to work for your booze. Here are a few opening options to keep the party going.
Wine: Pressure, Power, and Patience 💥 🍷
Spoon Your Wine
For those of you who don’t get flustered when the cork winds up floating in your wine, simply push the cork into the wine bottle using a wooden spoon!
The Ol’ Shoe on the Wall Trick
Put your wine bottle into a shoe, as you would your foot, and smack the sole of the shoe against the wall. The pressure generated from each smack will slowly squeak the cork out of the bottle. Fair warning, this option requires caution and a side of Gatorade because you will have to work it. Oh, and don't do what we did in the video. It made a big ol' mess. At least the wine is open 😉
The Carpenter’s Solution
You’ll need a reasonably long screw, a screwdriver, and a hammer. Take the screw, use the screwdriver to screw it into the cork, but leave a bit of the screw protruding from the cork. Use the backside of the hammer to pry the cork out. This is the best option for those of you who are tools… Sorry, those of you with tools.
Pump Up the Jam
I’ve heard of poppin’ bottles, but what about pumpin’ bottles? All you’ll need for this option is a bike pump with a needle attached. Stick the needle all the way through the cork, and pump it a few times. This will generate pressure inside of the bottle and force the cork out. Plus, you get the added perk of the pop noise sommeliers dream about.
Beer: Tricks, Tips, and Talents 🦷 🍺
The Dentist’s Nightmare
WARNING: NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART. Take the edge of the bottle cap and hold it between your teeth at a forty-five-degree angle. Stick to your molars in case of chipping. Nobody wants to chip a front tooth and wind up with a Mike Tyson lisp from trying to open a beer. Use the strength of your jaw to hold the bottle cap in the right place, and pry the bottle cap off with your teeth. It’s a damn cool party trick, but often results in blood and broken glass. Handoff is not responsible for unnecessary trips to the dentist. Be safe!
Dolla Dolla Bills Y’all!
Roll up a dollar bill vertically, or hot dog style, and make it as tight as you possibly can. Then, fold it in half horizontally, or hamburger style. The folded edge of the bill should be strong enough to place under a bottle cap and pop that sucker off! Once again, the almighty dollar proves its worth!
The Classic Countertop Smack n’ Ride
This classic maneuver has been passed down through generations. Simply place the rim of the bottle cap on the edge of a countertop and use the palm of your hand to smack down on the bottle cap, releasing your beverage from captivity. Please be careful about which surface you choose. Nobody wants to ruin Granny’s new granite countertops.
First thing’s first… keep your pants on. Second, you can use your belt buckle as a bottle opener! Undo your belt and put the bottle cap through the frame of your belt buckle. Just like a bottle opener, use some leverage to pry it open. Add some oomph with a loud yell… now you’re belting it in more ways than one!
(Don't try this one at home ^)
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